Talk:Komodo dragon
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GA comments
change- The people who live in Komodo Island call them ora, buaja durat (land crocodile) or biawak raksasa (giant monitor).[4][3] references should be in order
- The Komodo dragon's earholes are easy to see, but it is not very good at hearing.[11][3] same thing
- The Komodo dragon spread into these areas. They became isolated on the islands where they live today when sea levels rose again.[9][3] same thing, might be a few others like this
- Other pages should be changed to related pages
More later. Albacore (talk · changes) 03:05, 21 January 2011 (UTC)
- Hi Albacore. Thanks for the careful proofreading. I fixed the refs you indicated and checked all of the others. (Using Find on page and "][" was an easy way to find adjacent refs). Changed "Other" to "Related" too. Much appreciated! Gotanda (talk) 06:21, 21 January 2011 (UTC)
Refs are a mess.
- Ref 26 needs to be in {{cite web}} format and ABC needs to be spelled out to avoid confusion
- Done
- Ref 15, can you provide a URL (to show it's a reliable source, title connotes otherwise)
- I changed the source.
- Refs 2, 21, 22, 9, 32, 16, 5, 10, 30, 7 all need |accesdate s
- Done with 9, 16 and 30
- Do they really need access dates? 2, 5, 7, 10, 21, 22, 32 are all books, so I don't think they need access dates, do they really? Gotanda (talk) 21:23, 6 February 2011 (UTC)
- No, I suppose not, unless they have a url with them. Sorry for any confusion. Albacore (talk · changes) 21:32, 6 February 2011 (UTC)
- Ref 20 has 2 periods after "Inc"
- Done
- Don't like referencing to an encyclopedia, ref 18. Can you find an alternate source?
- Brittcanica is considered the most reliable encyclopedia. Why change it? wiooiw (talk) 21:39, 2 February 2011 (UTC)
- Ref 7 has 2 pp.
- Done
- Refs 2, 5, and 24 need page numbers. {{rp}} might be of use.
- Refs 7 and 10 need specifying on what pages they reference to.
- Date formats are off in refs 1, 19, 26, and 38.
- Done with 19, 26 and 38
- Fixed Ref 1 which used some ITIS template by changing to Cite Web. Hope that is a reasonable way to do it. Date displays properly now. Gotanda (talk) 00:15, 4 February 2011 (UTC)
- There's an extra space between ...protect Komodo dragon on its home islands. and the next paragraph. Might be better to have File:Komodo coin, Indonesia Dscn0057.jpg moved to the right?
- Fixed?
- tame needs an entry at the wiktionary
- Linked to Domestication.
Albacore (talk · changes) 15:48, 2 February 2011 (UTC)
- Albacore and wiooiw. You two make a great team at spotting all those bad refs and fixing them. I should have gotten to those comments when Albacore posted them, but wioow got there first. I'll try to be quicker next time. Gotanda (talk) 02:43, 3 February 2011 (UTC)
- Sorry ;) wiooiw (talk) 03:19, 3 February 2011 (UTC)
- Albacore and wiooiw. You two make a great team at spotting all those bad refs and fixing them. I should have gotten to those comments when Albacore posted them, but wioow got there first. I'll try to be quicker next time. Gotanda (talk) 02:43, 3 February 2011 (UTC)
Just to add a few comments
change- "The most dangerous bacteria in Komodo dragon saliva appears to be a kind of Pasteurella multocida that can often kill." I would think it is best to move "that can often kill" to the end of the first sentence in the section.
- Perhaps rename the section "poison" to "saliva" because the Komodo dragon is not a poisonous lizard.
- I went ahead and changed it as it would be factually incorrect. wiooiw (talk) 21:39, 2 February 2011 (UTC)
I'll probably add a few more minor comments later.wiooiw (talk) 05:45, 1 February 2011 (UTC)
- The correction of poison to saliva was exactly right--much better. Gotanda (talk) 02:43, 3 February 2011 (UTC)
Part 2
change- "Because they are so big, these lizards are still very important where they live." I'm not following that well. I'm assuming it was simplified from the sentence "As a result of their size, these lizards dominate the ecosystems in which they live." found on en.
- Yes, that was the passage I was trying to simplify. I removed the word "still" and hope that makes it more direct. Gotanda (talk) 02:43, 3 February 2011 (UTC)
- Well it is more direct, but why are they important? Prehaps change it to "... these lizards dominate the areas where they live"? wiooiw (talk) 03:19, 3 February 2011 (UTC)
- OK. I went with the Wiktionary linked "dominate", but reversed the clauses to make the subject lead the sentence: "These lizards dominate the areas where they live because they are so big." Look OK? Gotanda (talk) 08:01, 3 February 2011 (UTC)
- Well it is more direct, but why are they important? Prehaps change it to "... these lizards dominate the areas where they live"? wiooiw (talk) 03:19, 3 February 2011 (UTC)
- "Its scales have special connections to nerves that give it its sense of touch." Does that sound right? Perhaps remove the second "its"?
- I think it needs something there. Just "...give it sense of touch" won't work. Do you think "Its scales have special connections to nerves that give the lizard a sense of touch." is better? Gotanda (talk) 02:43, 3 February 2011 (UTC)
- Yes, that looks much better. wiooiw (talk) 03:19, 3 February 2011 (UTC)
The only other thing that needs to be done is some simplification, but that should not be much of a problem. wiooiw (talk) 20:46, 1 February 2011 (UTC)
- If you can point out any particular area you would like to see simplified, I'll try to get it done soon. Gotanda (talk) 02:43, 3 February 2011 (UTC)
- I don't see really anything that needs simplified now. wiooiw (talk) 03:19, 3 February 2011 (UTC)
- Cool. Thanks! Gotanda (talk) 08:01, 3 February 2011 (UTC)
- I don't see really anything that needs simplified now. wiooiw (talk) 03:19, 3 February 2011 (UTC)
This is super picky, I know...
changeI took a look at this and this is great shape and I expect this to be promoted. I had one question about the sentence "The Komodo dragon may not survive." Some readers could take this to refer to individual Komodo dragons as opposed to dragons as a species, so is there any way that we could make the wording less ambiguous? If not, it's probably okay since I couldn't think of any way to better word it without affecting the flow of the article. Kansan (talk) 00:52, 4 February 2011 (UTC)
- Kansan, I changed it to a plural. I think that clears up the ambiguity without reducing the readability. "There are very few Komodo dragons, and they may not survive. The lizards are on the IUCN Red List of animals in danger. Not many Komodo dragons still live on their home islands." Look OK? Thanks, for checking the article carefully. Gotanda (talk) 22:15, 4 February 2011 (UTC)
- That seems good to me! Kansan (talk) 22:47, 4 February 2011 (UTC)